How Complaining Fills Your Mind with Negativity

Research showed that most people complain once per minute in an actual conversation. Complaining is tempting; it gives us a sense of relief. It is, however, as harmful as many other fun things, such as smoking and eating a lot of fatty food.

We like our mind to be competent, but at the same time, we do not like to work harder than we should. When you repeat a certain behavior, such as complaining, your neurons branch into each other in order to facilitate data transfering. This will make the repetition of that behavior easier that you might not be aware of doing it.

You cannot blame your mind. No one wants to build a temporary bridge every time she/he wants to cross a river! It is always rational to build a permanent one. This way your neurons will grow closer, and links between them will have more continuity. To describe this process, scientists like to use the phrase "neurons that fire together, wire together."

Frequent complaints reprogram your brain in a way that makes it more likely to happen in the future, and by time, you will find that negativity is easier than positivity, regardless of what is happening around you. Complaining will become your primary behavior which changes the way people look at you.

Here is why: complaining can damage other parts of the brain too. Research conducted by Stanford University showed that complaining leads to the shrinking of the hippocampus, which is an essential area in the brain for problem solving and intelligent thinking. One of the worst things that can happen to your brain is damaging the hippocampus, especially because it is one of the basic areas that can be damaged by Alzheimer.

Complaint ruins your health:

We do not exaggerate when we say that complaining ruins the brain. However, it does not stop there. When you complain, your body releases cortisol, a stress hormone. Cortisol puts us in a fight-or-flight situation and moves oxygen, blood, and energy away from everything except the necessary systems for us to survive. Cortisol symptoms are high blood pressure and high blood sugar in order for you to be ready to run away or defend yourself.

High cortisol, resulting from complaints, weakens the immune system, and it increases the risk of getting high cholesterol, diabetes, heart diseases, and obesity. Moreover, it can even put your brain at high risk of getting apoplexy.

This is a case for many:

Because humans are naturally social beings, our brain subconsciously imitates the mood of people around us, especially people with whom we spend a long time. Mirror neurons do this process, and they are responsible for our ability to feel empathy.

However, this process has a negative effect which makes complaints more like smoking. You do not have to do it yourself to get its bad effects, but you should also be careful about spending time with people who complain too much. People who complain try to get other people to join them in complaining and grumbling in order for them to feel better.

Look at it this way: when you find yourself with a smoker, do you stay and inhale their smoke or do you leave the room?

How to get rid of compliant?

When you feel the need to complain, there are two things you can do. First, strengthen the feel of gratitude, so when you feel like complaining, move your attention to something you are grateful to have in your life.

Having time to think about what makes you content is not only the right thing to do, but it also reduces the stress hormone, cortisol, by 23%. Research conducted in California University, Davis, found that people who worked daily to strengthen their gratitude had noticeably better mood, higher energy, and less anxiety due to low cortisol levels.

So, any time you find yourself overwhelmed with negativity or pessimism, use this as a signal to change your life pace and to think of something positive. Positive attitude will be, by time, your lifestyle.

Second, you can do this only when you are right in complaining, and it is to do it in order to find a solution. You have to lead your complaint towards finding a solution through following these tips:

1. Have a clear goal: Before complaining, look for the result that you want. If you could not define your goal, you will probably complain for the sake of just complaining. This is something you have to end right away.
2. Start with something positive: It seems irrational to start complaining with a positive phrase, but this helps you to start positively and prevent the other party from having a defensive attitude. For example, before you complain about bad customer service, try saying something like, "I have been a customer of yours for a very long time, and I have always been so satisfied with your service…"
3. be specific: When you start complaining, it’s not the right time to seek every silly incident that happened 20 years ago. All you have to do is to deal with the current situation and be specific as much as you can. Rather than saying, "your employee has been rude to me", define exactly what that employee did that you found rude.
4. End your complaint positively: When you end your complaint saying "I will not do shopping here again", in this case your only goal is to vent your anger. Rather, rephrase your goals to achieve the result you want. For example, "I want to work on this problem in order to preserve the work relationship between us".

Conclusion:

Like other harmful habits, such as smoking, eating too much fat, laziness, and sitting in front of TV, complaining has its negative effects. Therefore, follow the tips in this article, and you will gain the benefits of having a positive attitude physically and mentally.